By Syed M.Aslam
08 - 14, 2002
*** "PEOPLE HAVE STARTED
to put blue contact lenses into their eyes and bleach their hair blond
for job interviews."
(Chairman of the European Network Against Racism,
Bashy Quraishy, commenting on the introduction of the toughest
immigration laws in Europe by Denmark)
*** "YOU HAVE to have
the voice of a street-corner rabble rouser or the training of a lawyer
or both. I have neither."
(The 38th maharaja of the once princely state of
Marawn-Jodhpur, Gaj Singh II explaining why he has never been drawn to
politics like some other Indian blue-bloods despite being a ambassador
and member of upper house of parliament)
*** "BUT 10 YEARS ago,
when it all went wrong we had to find a way to survive. We were no
longer of use to anyone. And we had to think what to do to save our
(Head of science at Russian oceanography institute
which used to train dolphins to spy to guard the communist's regime
most strategic bay in Sevastopol. The dolphins are now used for
therapy to soothe certain ailments)
*** "... I HAVE STRONG
opinions about Britain's current situation and I feel that in a time
when public debate is being suppressed, even something as trivial as a
pop song can be a good thing."
(British singing idol George Michael admitting that
his latest song 'Shoot the Dog', is a political satire. The cartoon
video shows US President Bush on the White House lawn petting a
smiling poodle-shaped British Prime Minister Tony Blair)
*** "THE CITY OF CALGARY
is spending $300,000 (U.S.$200,000) to throw this (party), and that
money could have been better spent on the homeless or the
(One of the anti-globalisation protestors
denouncing the costly G-8 meeting held in Canada recently)
*** "THE ONLY REASON
there is peace and order in Davao is because of me. I don't use tracer
bullets. If I'm going out, I'm going out with my guns blazing."
(Gun-packing Mayor of southern Philippines city of
Davao, Rodrigo Duterte, who goes around the city at night twice a week
on his motorcycle to 'dispense swift justice')
*** "I DON'T WANT
CONDOLENCES, I want congratulations. We love martyrdom as much as
Israel loves the fantasy life it is leading."
(Mother of 19-year Palestinian suicide bomber
Mohammed expressing her jubilation over his martyrdom)
*** "ALL OF US are just
like plants. We are based on a branching architecture."
(Paediatric transplant surgeon and the leader of
research team from Massachusetts Institute of Technology, Joseph P.
Vacanti, commenting on a successful experiment to grow human organs in
*** "IF I HAD to do it
all over again, I'd just let it rip. To hell with the polls, tactics
and all the rest."
(Former US Vice President and the unsuccessful
Democratic presidential candidate, Al Gore, indicating that he will
run again and would shed constraints of polls, tactics and consultants
that marred his 2000 campaign)
*** "MY HARD WORK and
efforts are the reason behind my success..."
(Abdulsamad Moosa, a 42-year-old UAE national,
expressing joy at passing his English exam after almost two decades.
He, however, failed in Math and will have to take the examination
again to qualify for his high school diploma)
*** "I'M SURE you
understand that the Mercedes was a gift, and our policies are not made
on the basis of gifts."
(South African foreign minister Dr Nkosazana
Dlamini-Zuma commenting on presentation of an armour-plated Mercedes
to President Thabo Mbeki as gift by Libyan President Colonel Muammar
*** "DOCTORS ARE NOT
working on a production line, they are providing individual care for
individual patients. Patients want more time with their doctors and
quality care must not be compromised in favour of greater
(Chairman of British Medical Association, Dr Ian Bogle, accusing
the government of treating the doctors like factory workers by
pressurizing them to increase output at the expense of patient care)