By Syed M.Aslam
Apr 09 - 15, 2001
*** "I THOUGHT he had a little character
when he said that he would not surrender. Now we know not only that he's
a bad politician, we know he's a coward."
(Former Yugoslavian prime minister Milan Panic
commenting on the arrest of former president Slobodan Milosevic, the
'Balkan Butcher' responsible for 'ethnic cleansing' which killed
thousands of defenseless Muslims)
*** "THE PRESIDENT has an unacceptable
attitude and we demand that he step down from his function as head of
the High Council of Magistrates."
(Head of French Magistrates' Union, Evelyn e
Sire-Marin, speaking at a rally protesting President Jacques Chirac's
denouncing a magistrate for summoning him in a Paris sleaze inquiry. The
rally demanded Chirac to testify as an ordinary citizen in municipal
corruption probe during his stint as Mayor of Paris)
*** "TO QUOTE Mark Twain, 'The first of
April' is the day we remember what we are like the other 364 days of the
(New York-based public relations consultant Jeff
Barge whose April Fool's Day survey voted the two-time former president
Bill Clinton the 'most foolish American')
*** "IN MY SENTENCES I go where no man has
gone before . . . I've expanded the definition of words themselves using
valcanise when I meant polarise, Grecians when I meant Geeks,
inebriating when I meant exhilarating and instead of barriers and
tariffs, I said terriers and bariffs and you know what, life goes
(US President George W. Bush jokingly referring to
his much criticised grammatical gaffes at his second solo news
*** "WE ARE TRYING to teach the people not
be afraid of anything and be clear and honest to talk about anything . .
. and we're also trying to teach people in power to know that when they
are really at fault they have to admit they are at fault."
(Publisher and cartoonist of Syria's first
independent newspaper Al-doumari in decades, Ali Farzat, explaining the
popularity of the newspaper which spawns a black market in used copies)
*** "VERY SELDOM do other countries get
involved when the elephants are pitted against each other."
(Philippines President Gloria Arroyo stressing Manila
is maintaining a neutral stance between the US-China standoff over the
seizing of US spy plane alongwith 24 crew by China)
*** "HAVING A WIFE at home would have
obviate any such problems for the prime minister."
(Poet Surendra Sharma humorously suggesting that had
Indian Prime Minister Vajpayee been married, he could have avoided much
of his current political woes at the hand of women politicians at a
function where Vajpayee was also present)
*** "MANY THINGS have happened — though
nothing has changed. The situation with regard to certain issues that
are vital to humanity has deteriorated."
(Cuban President Fidel Castro warning that a new Cold
War and arms race loomed on the horizon at the opening of the 105th
summit of the Inter-parliamentary Union participated by some 1,400
legislators from 120 nations at Havana)
*** "````THE CHINESE side has every right
to carry out investigation, so the crew members are in China, because
the investigation is going on."
(Chinese Foreign Minister Jang Jiaxuan defending the
seizure of the US spy plane and its 24 crew)
*** "IT IS A MATTER of life and death for
us. Eighty percent of our islands are just one metre above sea level.
Any rise in the sea level will have a severe impact on Maldives. The
Maldivian people will become environmental refugees."
(Director of Environmental Affairs of Maldives saying
the US' decision to reject the Kyoto treaty on global warming would mean
disaster for small island nations. The highest point on any of the
islands is only about three metres above the sea level)
*** "THOSE WHO protest against 'globalisation'
appear too often to be self-designated representatives of developing
(Chairman of Federal Reserve, Alan Greenspan, telling
the US Congress that the reversal of globalisation process will be a